* upgrade transformers to 5.1.0 and torchao to 0.16.0
* upgrade trl for parity
* handle trl api changes
* orpo doesn't have max_prompt_len to check anymore
* cpoconfig doesn't take max_prompt_length and fix cpu offload
* slow fsdp1 test
* triton min 3.4.0 and liger to 0.7.0
* use transformers main for now for zero3 fix
* handle group_by_length change
* fix changes upstream
* mark skip flaky test
* use transformers latest release 5.2.0
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