* update trl to 0.17.0
* grpo + vllm no longer supported with 2.5.1 due to vllm constraints
* disable VLLM_USE_V1 for ci
* imporve handle killing off of multiprocessing vllm service
* debug why this doesn't run in CI
* increase vllm wait time
* increase timeout to 5min
* upgrade to vllm 0.8.4
* dump out the vllm log for debugging
* use debug logging
* increase vllm start timeout
* use NVL instead
* disable torch compile cache
* revert some commented checks now that grpo tests are fixed
* increase vllm timeoout back to 5min
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